Steven's Munchies/Transcript

(The episode starts at the Big Donut. Steven enter and heads to the counter.)

Steven: So, what do you have that I haven't had?

Sadie: Well, glaze, I guess.

Steven: (He slams ten dollars on the counter.) Three, please.

(He walks out of the donut shop and eats one of the donuts, while walking.)

Steven: (mouthful) Not bad.

(He stops and sees a sign at Fish Stew Pizza saying, "Try Our New Tripple-Stuffed Pizza!")

Steven: Mmm.

(He enters the restaurant. Later, back at the house, Pearl made dinner.)

Pearl: Steven, stop eating that pizza. It took me 14 minutes to make this for you. Have some.

Steven: Come on, give me 7 minutes. I only have one slice left.

Pearl: (pause) Alright.

(Amethyst walks in.)

Amethyst: Come on, P, how bad could it be?

Pearl: I haven't a clue. But...

(Steven snags the steak and adds salt. He tries it.)

Steven: Tastes good.

Pearl: I'm just concerned of him stuffing himself with junk.

Amethyst: So what? He's half-Gem. He'll know what to do.

(A montage of Steven eating unhealthy food begins. He buys ten glazed donuts at the Big Donut. Then, he gets another tripple-stuffed pizza at Fish Stew. At home, he makes toast and adds butter on three slices. He eats them one at a time. Then, frybits at Beach Citywalk Fries. He goes around town for more to eat.)

(A black screen shows white text saying, "Four Weeks Later...")

(After the text, the scene cuts to the intro.)

Garnet: ♪ We...

Amethyst and Pearl: ♪ ...are the Crystal...

(Steven tries to do a front-flip, but, fails, as of now being overweight, making him land on his back. He gets up and pants. Then, he puts his fist out. The intro resumes.)

All: ♪ Gems! (The scene cuts to the warp pad.) We'll always...

(The blue light flashes from the pad, but, fails to cover Steven's overgrown stomach.)

Amethyst: Suck it in, yo!

(Steven inhales, and they warp. The song resumes.)

All: ♪ ...save the day!

(The scene cuts to Garnet's hand tussling Steven's hair.)

Steven: ♪ And if you think we can't, we'll...

All: ♪ ...always...

(The Gems run and Steven's behind them. He slows down. The Gems stop running.)

Garnet: Steven, are you OK?

Steven: (panting) I... just... need... to... catch my breath. (He inhales, then, exhales.) OK, let's resume.

(They resume running. But, Steven doesn't run to the front.)

All: ♪ ...find a way!

(The scene cuts to Greg driving pass the boardwalk to the beach house.)

Garnet: ♪ That's why the people...

All: ♪ ''...of this world... ♪''

(After Greg slams down a grill to the ground, Steven wheezes. Sadie hears in the distance. She takes off her work shirt and has her black shirt on. She gives her working shirt to Lars and runs to the house.)

Sadie: Cover for me.

(At the beach house...)

Steven: (wheezing) I feel like my heart's getting stabbed. But, no sword or knife.

Greg: (chuckles) No offense, but, no sword or knife, good one.

Sadie: He's having a myocardial infarction! (Greg stares at Sadie and says nothing back.) Heart attack!

(Steven falls to the ground.)

Greg: Come on, son! Don't die on me, fight this! (Steven's eyes close a little bit.) Do this for me! Please! (Steven closes his eye real shut.)

(Later, Steven wakes up in a hospital, and Greg and Pearl stare at him.)

Greg: Son! Oh, thank gosh, you're OK!

Doug: Surely.

Pearl: Doug? Where's Dr. Maheswaran?

Doug: She caught a cold. So, I'm filling in. I know a little bit of her knowledge as a doctor. (He pulls out an X-Ray picture.) As you can see, in this X-Ray scan, that's a piece of a steak bone stuck in his throat. A good thing, one of our professionals got it out.

Pearl: Oh, my. You know, I think Steven should need a little diet and exercise to get him back into shape.

Doug: Heh. That's what I was about to say.

(Back at the house, Steven slurps a soda from a can with a straw. Pearl walks in.)

Pearl: I've return and got these so called, "heart smart foods".

(Steven pulls out a carrot from a bag and eats it.)

Steven: (mouthful) What else?

(He pulls out a container of cottage cheese. He dips his carrot in it and eats it. After he does, he shivers.)

Pearl: One at a time!

Steven: Alright! (He pulls out a spoon, scoops the cottage cheese and eats it.) Somehow, I'm not fond to this.

Pearl: Please, you need to try. You have to. If it happens again, I'll loose you!

Steven: OK, Pearl. (He faces it and eats half of the whole thing. He swallows.)

(Later, him and Garnet are outside.)

Garnet: Now, before we exercise, one: never give up. Two: stay calm. The first exercise we'll do is run a marathon. I'll go first to show you. We'll time ourselves to see who ran the fastest. And three: it's not all about winning.

(Steven nods.)

Garnet: Ready, go!

(Steven presses a button that activates the stopwatch. Steven sees Garnet run. The scene cuts to a black screen, with text that say, "Two Hours Later...". The scenes cuts back to Steven. Garnet returns.)

Steven: You ran two hours and seven minutes.

Garnet: Now, you're up.

(Steven gets up and stretches. Then, he starts to run fast. Three hours later, Steven returns to the house.

Steven: How'd I do?

Garnet: Three hours and thirty-four minutes. You ran very slow. Sorry, but, remember, it's not all about winning. Now, next up, lift weights.

(Steven faints. Later, Steven's in Amethyst's room for advice.)

Steven: I need advice, Amethyst. How can I loose a pound without dieting and exercise?

Amethyst: Well, remember when you showed that alternate reality T.V. thing?

Steven: And your alternate reality? Yeah! Oh, wait. I can't do that in over two months. It was just a alternate reality.

Amethyst: Hmm... What about the skin deep diet? I heard about it on a T.V. show once. You're only allowed to eat fruit and vegetable skins.

Steven: Are you sure?

Amethyst: 50% if it can.

(He leaves the room. A few days later, he peels all the apple's skin off. He eats the skin whole. He eats the skinless apple next. He obliviously passes by Pearl and Garnet.)

Pearl: Amethyst?

Garnet: Amethyst.

(Later, they're in her room.)

Amethyst: Do you not ever heard of the skin deep diet?

Garnet: Yes. But, he hasn't lost a pound in over a month.

Amethyst: T.V. shows.

Pearl: Well, if all the other things didn't work, we have to dig deeper.

Amethyst: How about...

(Later, Steven walks by the house and opens the door. Then sees the Gems, Greg and Sadie looking down at him.)

Steven: What's going on? Is this a surprise?

Greg: No.

Garnet: (to herself) They're here. (to Steven) turn around.

(Steven does so and sees two men grabbing him my his arms and putting him in their van.)

Steven: Hey, what's going on?

Pearl: Well, those men are taking you to a weight loss camp.

(Later, their at the camp. Inside they meet the coach.)

Coach: Greg, Pearl, your boy'll get the good treatment here. I guarantee it. Sampson Talloan's the name.

Pearl: Thank you, sir.

Sampson: Pearl, your boy's gonna need one thing: I don't know what it is yet. But, I think I can slim him down and he'll be a new boy that you'll never recognize!

(Sampson backflips and lands on a chair with his hands.)

Greg: This guy's amazing! Steven, I want you to know, we're doing this for your own good. But, we still love you. Good luck.

(He kisses his forehead and they both leave.)

(The first day of training begins. Steven's roped to a anvil.)

Sampson: This is about pulling weights. Now, you might think it's ridiculous. But, this is the only thing I have that's the heaviest. Here's how this works you pull this as fast as you can all the way to the finish line. Then, you put it back at this exact place. Ready, set, go!

(He activates the airhorn. Steven pulls the anvil as fast as he can run.)

Steven: This is insane, who does this?

Sampson: Nobody, you're the first one!

Steven: How many more?

Sampson: 70! (He blares the airhorn again.)

(Back at the house...)

Pearl: I've got a call from Talloan that Steven's not doing well.

Greg: If only if there was a way we could get him back to the way he was.

Amethyst: Garnet, you do know you have the power to see into the future, right?

Garnet: I'll try. (pause) He'll make it.

Greg: That's it?! Nothing else?

Garnet: I can't tell you anything else of what will happen next. No one should ever know about...

Amethyst: It's not about us! It's about Steven!

Garnet: Well, you're involved in this too!

Amethyst: Oh, you're one to talk. You too!

Greg: This is gonna be a long argument, isn't it?

(Back at camp, a montage begins. It starts with Steven doing push-ups.)

Sampson: Now with one arm.

(Steven does so. Now he's on the treadmill.)

Sampson: Speed it up!

(Sampson makes it go faster. Steven runs faster.)

Steven: (panting) This is too fast!

Sampson: Can't make time stand still.

(Now, he does pull ups, then, climbing, exercise, lifting weights, punching a dummy. The montage ends with Steven panting.)

Sampson: How was it, kid?

Steven: It felt like non-stop. But, I feel pumped. I feel like doing more of these things.

Sampson: Good boy! But, first how about a visit?

(Later, they arrive at the house. Steven opens the door.)

Pearl: Steven?

Steven: I learn a little something today. That even that you like that junk food, you might miss your old size. I know it doesn't make sense, but, you know what I mean.

Pearl: Aww.

Sampson: Before we tie thing up, I'd like to have a conversation with his father.

Greg: Why?

(They take a drive in the van.)

Greg: I don't know, Sampson. Is this too much?

Sampson: Mr. Universe, who knows? Maybe you'll have one someday, soon.

Greg: Oh, ha-ha-ha.

Sampson: I'm serious. You never know if it might happen.

(Still driving, the van goes far off.)

Sampson: Besides, you'll like my camp.

Greg: I hope I do. If not... I don't know.

(The episode ends with the star iris filling the whole screen black.)