User blog:Deyvan Salez/I doubt my roleplaying skills.

Listen. I just got back from a pretty stellar Homestuck roleplay. But to understand my personal problem, I need to share some H I S T O R Y. Ever since 2012 i've been roleplaying. Roleplaying is my freaking life. I did LARPing in school, roleplay in non roleplay games, heck, roleplaying is one of my main focused here! But there was one thing I was always unsure of. A problem that I had ever since 2012.

Am I a god modder?

I always asked myself that question. I always did. I believed if I continued roleplaying, I would be able to set a stand where I wasn't a godmodder and mary sue. Going to this wikia helped my confidence, along with discord roleplays. They helped me feel like I established a clear connection between fair roleplaying, and awesome characters. Especially here. The fact that I got all 10 of my characters approved helped boosted my self esteem.

Until I did the Homestuck roleplay. I was so excited to do so, since I FINALLY finished Homestuck. Once I get in to something I like.. ITS TIME TO ROLEPLAY BOI! At first it was going smoothly. However, the question came up to me again. "Am I a god modder?", I repeatedly asked myself. Until the hoster straight up said I was.

This basically confirms i'm a crap roleplayer. I never improved ever since 2012, and I personally don't think I can get out of the corner of godmodders. I kinda feel sad, since I tried so hard to learn how to roleplay good, however I believe I failed.

So, if you care.. I may be taking another break. Sorry guys, I need to go talk to some guys. Including you guys. Hopefully i'll get out of this corner, through DEUS EX MACHINA! Also should I raid that discord server?