Thread:I-Ship-Stevidot/@comment-27847292-20160824114229/@comment-7190615-20160825104059

Stevi, please listen to me. I'm not upset, I'm trying to like... Well, I'm being my optimistic self. and I'm going to talk about a pretty harsh topic and I'm going to go on forever about it.

Killing yourself, downgrading yourself, putting yourself down over and over doesn't fix anything. It only cuts off your chances of making anything get better. Take it from me, I kept crap talking myself and just making myself feel bad because I couldn't write as well as the others, I couldn't draw as well, I couldn't act as mature but with time I grew and I've been littling my depression into nothingness and if it weren't for the friends who actually signed a Bible and sent it to me, sent me post cards and get well letters, messages every day of happiness, the websites javascripted to make you feel better, I doubt I'd be here today. Of course, I still down talk myself on occassion but that's usually because I need to get something out of my system.

To quote someone who I have idolized since they released the video I'm quoting, "Get a better mirror, look a little closer, stare a little longer, because there's something inside you that made you keep trying".

There are all sorts of things that you can do, give yourself ten minutes, listen to zen music, meditate, do yoga for a bit, draw (and not harshly criticize it). You're still quite a bit younger than me, you need to find a passion, you need to love it and better yourself.

You may find yourself in a pit of despair every so often and that's okay but it's just a life thing that the negatives are more lasting than the positives. Every pit of depression, despair, and unhappiness has it's light eventually and it usually comes in taking time out of your day in order to deliberately try and find something that may be little but is still reassuring. One way to do this (and it helps with sadness, proven fact) is by taking a journal and writing down things you're happy for like "the flowers bloomed today!!" or "I wasn't called a terrible name!!" or anything like that. Little things.

The answer when you don't ask is always going to be "No". The same applies to when you don't try and when you don't give yourself enough time. You used to be a much happier person, sure a bit childish but let's be real here, I'm a seventeen year old that's about to ship myself off to college after this year. There's something that I always wish I could have back and it's the enthusiasm to take a joke, to play a little, to laugh and smile at my own mistakes, and to just overall love yourself (but don't be as narcissistic as me because people don't like that offline, whoops). If anything, take a little bit of time to dive into visual aesthetics like light colours, flowers, the sun rising and setting.

And finally, you need to smile because faking a smile usually makes yourself feel better by tricking your body into thinking that you are happy.

That's enough from me, I think I've gone on long enough, sorry ;;. I know it's a lot but please read over it and if you need anything, again, don't hesitate to leave a message on my wall or anything.