Jazz's Universe

Random idea I had that I am attempting to carry out. -

[static]

Hello? Can you hear me?

[a grainy image appears]

I hope someone can hear this. You! You watching this, did I interrupt your daily dose of your favorite cartoon, Steven Universe? Good! Ya know why that's good? Because nothing in Steven Universe is real. It was created by humans after all. They don't know what they're talking about, and the gaps between the few facts they know are abstractly filled.

I'm here to tell you that everything in the show Steven Universe is fake. That's right, Rose Quartz, Steven, Pearl, Garnet, and Amethyst are not real. Well, the gems Rose Quartz, Pearl, and Amethyst are real, but not the ones featured in the show specifically. Garnets aren't real, we don't have those, we have Rubies and Sapphires though. Obviously no Stevens, because, that's not even a gem.

Backtracking on what I said earlier, not everything in Steven Universe is fake. Just a lot of stuff is. The Gem War happened, Pink Diamond was shattered, and Rebecca Sugar actually got quite a bit of the Gem hierarchy and culture right. Surprising.

[video cuts out]

[cuts back in]

---ere is what I have to tell you. I'm here to tell you the real story, and for the sake of it, kind of ironic, I'm calling this story, Jazz's Universe. A play on the show, and also on my name. Did I not say my name? My name is Yellow Jasper, a former soldier in Yellow Diamond's court, and current Crystal Gem.

Here is the real story.